I am updating a post that I wrote a few weeks ago regarding strange rashes on my body. http://rectalcancermyass.wordpress.com/2013/05/13/the-fungus-among-us/
My skin looks the same as it did back then and the doctor has decided I have psoriasis on my legs and eczema on my face. The cause? Stress. Stress? Isn’t that what doctors tell us when they are plain stumped? I looked on the web again and Dr. Fuhrman’s site says psoriasis is an autoimmune problem. He suggests eating a healthy diet. I thought I was!
Back to the “drawing board”… I know my body can heal itself and I plan to find out what I can do…herb, food or supplement wise to help it. There are still many other avenues I haven’t checked, like herbs. I tried rubbing coconut oil on my skin and that didn’t work for me.
So I am now experimenting with rubbing pure aloe vera on my skin and adding 1/2 teaspoon turmeric to my daily smoothie. I will keep you posted as to my progress.
“I choose to focus on that which is life-giving and positive.” That is the affirmation I start my day with. I do my modified morning sun salutation and meditate to start my day, but even while I do that, those negative thoughts try to creep in — I sometimes have two thoughts going at the same time. I know I am not the only one who experiences this because I read about it on many blogs and in Buddhist literature.
I am fascinated though as to how our minds work. Why do our minds seem to prefer negative thoughts over positive ones? Are we prone to “drama”? Is it environmental or is something else going on? Do people who live a hermit life have the same “thought” issues?
I am aware that our thoughts have an effect on our bodies and on our health. I know laughing raises endorphins which keep our immune system functioning properly. There are many sites online that teach people how to limit negative thinking, but nothing really about why our brains have negative thoughts. Or is it just me? I am aware that under stress my OCD kicks in…mainly negative thoughts playing out over-and-over.
I don’t know the answer to any of these questions, but I can keep working towards thinking more positive thoughts. At least I am aware of it and knowledge is power. What are your thoughts about this topic? Have you found any scientific studies? Do you struggle with the same thing?
A couple of weeks ago I bumped into a patient *Bob, I hadn’t seen in a while. He is 84 years old and has been getting chemo for about a year. His wife lost a leg from cellulitis a few years ago and has a prosthetic leg. She is dependent on him and they both use a walker to get around. That day they were trying to find the building where they were supposed to meet with his doctor. I happened to know where it was and helped them get there. Along the way, Bob told me that he was done with treatment and wanted to live out his days at home with his family. Chemo was too much for his body and he was miserable. He knew that the chemo was only buying him only a few more months anyway. He would not be coming to the medical center anymore and he thanked me for being there for him.
Imagine my surprise, when yesterday, I found him at the infusion center waiting to get hooked up to an IV. His wife and grandson were with him. I told him, I was happy to see him and Bob responded “I am only here to get some hydration” and his nurse responded, “No, you are here for chemo”.
That’s when the fight broke out. It seems that Bob was brought to infusion under false pretenses. The doctor was called. His wife was crying. His grandson, apparently didn’t know the real reason they were there either and sided with his grandfather. I decided it was a good idea for me to walk away.
About 30 minutes later, the group walked by me and again Bob said his “good-byes”… his wife was clearly upset. I tried to comfort her … I understand her anguish. I also understand the need to live a life worth living and sometimes, it’s better to look at the quality and not quantity. Bob is 84. Even if he didn’t have cancer, he probably would only live a few more years. I think he made the right decision.
I think my Buddhist practice helps me a great deal, working with terminal patients. I know very well, that none of us get out of here alive and we need to focus on living in the present moment and be happy with our lives just the way they are. Gratitude will take you a long way. Whether we have months or years to live — it’s all about the quality of our lives.
*Not patient’s real name