I have never been big on getting high or drunk. It’s a control thing. I also come from a substance abuse household and saw first hand what problems come with that lifestyle. When my tumor popped out my tush, my views about drugs changed drastically. It wasn’t about getting high, it was about staying sane. Anyone who experienced chronic pain knows exactly what I’m talking about.
My tumor looked like dryer lint. The doctor said it was fibrous. I only knew it was extremely painful. Morphine, Hydrocodone, and Vicodin became my friends, and at the end of my radiation treatment I took a lot, just to be comfortable.
Chemo made me sick, I lost the taste for my favorite foods and I had zero appetite. My son brought me marijuana edibles because the Marinol my doctor prescribed didn’t do anything for me. There is an ongoing battle between the Feds and those who want marijuana legalized. I am in favor. If you ask me, I think big pharma is the one who does not want it legal. They want the monopoly on drugs. Period.
Marijuana helped me eat and stop throwing up what I ate. I finally gained back some weight and felt better. I always made sure I told my doctors what I was doing because I didn’t want anything to interfere with my treatment. In all, I had to use pain meds for 6 months. It took me a month to wean off the opiates. That was a weird time and I can understand why an addict has a hard time getting clean. I learned to decipher real pain from ghost pain. My body liked the high and I got pain in areas I never had before.
I get scanned a couple of times a year…they call it surveillance and I have to spend 30 minutes in a tube that takes pictures of my insides. I don’t like enclosed things. I’m claustrophobic big time so I take a little yellow pill and everything is alright. We know when it’s kicked in because I am super friendly to everyone and anyone. I am quite animated and have been known to break into a dance in the middle of the waiting room.
I still don’t like taking drugs but sometimes I need a little help from my friends.